14 Comments
May 5, 2023Liked by Michelle Elman

I live here, my parents live abroad. So I don’t see them as often as I wish I could. My mum has always commented on my weight - whether I lost or gained it. Sat both my parents down on our last video call before my latest visit and told them I didn’t want to hear anything about my weight or how I look, whether they mean to complement or not, as I really struggle with body image. It was hard, but they stuck to it and I felt better for it.

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May 5, 2023Liked by Michelle Elman

My dad told me my face got thinner. I told him I don't appreciate such comments even if they were meant as a compliment. I struggle with body image and do not need reminders of paying attention to my looks.

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I really hate being touched when I’m eating so I’ve asked my husband and family not to, they respected it but I knew they thought it was a bit strange, once I explained it’s a sensory overload for me they haven’t mentioned it again and just respect it.

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I am on my second month of a new office job and just finished my tasks for this week while WFH. Instead of jumping into something that had originally been scheduled for next week, I am taking the afternoon to clean, do some self care and read. And I won't feel bad for being "unproductive".

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I said no to plans with a friend; my day was free, I just has a different vision for how I would’ve liked to spend it. I told my friend I want to do it in June, though, and he said sure. It’s going to be my first hike since moving to the UK and I’m so excited.

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Sat down and had a conversation with a partner about how things they had done made me feel and what I would like/need going forward. Conversations like this are really hard for me, I hate them but I was hating feeling unhappy and resentful more. People can't potentially change behaviour if they're not aware of it either.

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In the last year I've been bloating alot after big meals. Whenever my mum sees my bloated stomach she says 'pull it in! It's healthy, remember?' as she's always done. I've recently voiced my concerns to her, how I can't help how my body reacts to food (not like i used to 'pull it in') and asked her to not comment on my body in that way. Feels empowering! Just voicing a boundary, even if she might forget it/keep saying this. :) Small steps <3

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I think my biggest win was realizing that "women don't owe you pretty". I don't wear much make up cause I don't really like it. I don't listen to comments like: "this hairstyle would suit you better" or "those clothes are not complimenting your figure". I decide about what I look like and what feels good to me. As long as I feel good in my skin, that's all that matters to me.

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I take care of my body robustly. Good diet, fasting, exercise, and so on. I believe it looks good really. But for some reason I get people commenting "Why do you fast? Fasting destroys your body." "Humans must eat everything, therefor you are wrong for not eating junk food." "Maybe you have an eating disorder." "My uncle got type A diabetes from doing what you do." People also always say that I look thinner than before, but never thicker, according to their remarks I am skeleton now.

But anyway, I don't mind them.

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