13 Comments
Jun 14, 2023Liked by Michelle Elman

I agree. We cant denounce toxic masculinity in one breath and then tell men they dont have any problems when they do open up about their experiences in another breath

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Jun 14, 2023Liked by Michelle Elman

I agree with everything that your saying as part of a broader approach, but I do also think there is space to have deeper conversations about issues people have. I do feel like those deeper conversations shouldn’t be pitting one thing against another. Yes women and men have grown up in a world that tells them what they should look like, but these feel like two separate issues. To do one vs another isn’t right and there is space to discuss both these issues.

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Jun 18, 2023Liked by Michelle Elman

Writing amazingly as always! And I agree. This competition of who has it worse, just makes it worse for everyone.

And I was one of those during the pandemic; home alone for three months with no outside contact except the grocery delivery, but others had it worse, so I didn’t want to complain.

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Jun 16, 2023Liked by Michelle Elman

As an American, I must say that I disagree about “victimhood“. It is very common for people to engage in this type of behavior simply because they see other people benefit from it. There is a real problem with self accountability and taking responsibility for one’s own action. I’ve particularly noticed a sense of entitlement that seems to be widespread. I’m not sure where this comes from, but it’s as if one person sees another benefiting from being loud, and even if they don’t have a leg to stand on, they replicate the same behavior.

I do agree that some people truly do need to be heard and given space to be validated and understood. However, it has become popular to be loud without merit for the sake of joining whatever topic seems to be popular and gain attention at the time.

I think a lot of people that do this could have valid experiences and feelings, but terms such as “TRAUMA “are over simplified and used incorrectly. There is a bandwagon effect where people jump on board without truly understanding the nuance or depth of its meaning.

That being said, I do not believe this is everyone! I think this culture(And social media!) has allowed people to speak up and be heard in ways that they never have before, which is wonderful! Every person deserves to be heard, but one would hope that it was for a genuine and valid reason, and not just someone trying to take advantage of The opportunity.

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Jun 15, 2023Liked by Michelle Elman

I think diet culture has ramped up for men in recent times. I feel like women have been marketed to more when it comes to diet products etc over the decades and now men are experiencing the full force of marketing of gym culture. I feel like I hear more and more guys at work obsessing over the gym more than women over their weight. Thankfully, women are being more accepting of themselves.

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I think you're right, we need to stop taking part in the pity party, stop bragging who has it worse but create a platform when everyone feels seen and heard. I think this is part of cultural problem both in the UK, USA, and in Poland, where I grew up, that when somebody asks us how we're doing, we feel implied to be polite and not burden anybidy with our struggles,so we answer with "fine, thanks. how are you you?" We are taught to suppress our emotion, we are taught that we need to fit into a norm and standard, so we very often don't know how to be authentic.

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